


That's Not Nice...

by FVAllDay



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Boys Kissing, Canon Gay Relationship, Dry Humping, First Time, Kissing, M/M, Masturbation, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-29 02:40:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16735515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FVAllDay/pseuds/FVAllDay
Summary: What happens after the kiss–Season 4, Episode 1





	That's Not Nice...

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, I'm really nervous. I've been sitting on this since June! I've never written a fanfic before and don't do much writing in general. I decided to post it because I enjoy reading any and all David/Patrick fics and thought someone might enjoy this, maybe??? I'm sorry about any structural or grammar issues, I just tend to make things worse when I start editing, so I decided to post "as is". I welcome feedback, but please be kind :)

David gathered Patrick’s face in his hands and moved in for a slow, lingering kiss. “Where do I fall on the nice scale now???” asked David coyly.

 

“You’re getting there, but I’m still not entirely convinced” Patrick murmured as David leaned in for another kiss, this time deeper and more urgent.

 

“How about now???” David whispered dragging his lips across Patrick’s ear

 

“Hmmmm, you’ll get there, eventually–if I were you, I’d keep working at it…” Patrick said with a sly smile.

 

Just as David was leaning in for another kiss, he heard the ring of the bell and saw a customer entering the store from the corner of his eye.

 _For fuck’s sake, why now!!!_ Patrick sprung into action and went over to greet her.

 

This gave David a chance to reflect on what just transpired. An overwhelming sense a relief washed over him. The panic he felt thinking he had “messed things up” (as Alexis so helpfully called out this morning) really rattled him. He wasn’t lying when he said this was all new for him and he was FREAKING OUT…he was so far out of his comfort zone. He felt like he was in a bad RomCom. _Wait...Is there such a thing as a bad RomCom???_ Either way, his life had NEVER resembled a RomCom in any way, shape or form…ever. Except maybe the part where the heroine is home alone on a Saturday night, emotionally eating a pint of ice cream and waiting for the phone to ring.

 

The rest of the day shaped up to be quite busy, which was probably for the best. David needed to come back to reality and keep his wits about him. He already realized that he was 100% powerless when it came to this doe-eyed Siren. _Oh, Patrick_ …And as if he read his mind–Patrick flashed him the most adorable smile from across the room and held his gaze with his beautiful brown eyes for what seemed like an eternity. _See??? A Siren. Seriously–How is this actually happening_???  

 

And then it dawned on him– _fuck, I still need a place to crash tonight!_   Sharing an adjoining room with his parents was humiliating enough, sleeping on a cot in their actual room? Not an option. He decided to spring for a hotel room in Elmdale for the night. And let’s face it, he probably needed some time to think and clear his head a bit. He excused himself to the backroom and dialed up the Crystal Elms spa. He thought, _why not turn this into a business opportunity and offer a sample package of spa products from the shop in exchange for a discounted rate_? Patrick entered the backroom just as he was discussing the rate for the night. He started shaking his head “no” and motioning for David to hang-up.

 

Now on hold, David turned to Patrick and said “may I help you?”.  

 

“David, don’t be silly, you’re staying at my place tonight–I won’t take no for an answer.”

 

“Are you sure that’s what you want?”

 

“Yes, I’m sure…I think it’s clear to both of us that there was a misunderstanding.”

 

When the desk clerk returned to the phone, David thanked her and informed her that he didn’t need the room after all. As a good will gesture, he made arrangements to drop by with some products the following week. Also thinking in the back of his mind– _I MAY need a hotel room in the near future,_ a wry smile crossing his face–I mean, he was only human… _and taking it slow doesn’t mean never,_ he thought wistfully…

 

He hung up the phone and Patrick continued…

 

 “I WANT to spend the night with you, I never didn’t want to, I just had to be clear that we needed to take it slow. I also want to stress that it’s not just about me, I want it to be different for you too. Maybe it’s a little bit of jealousy on my part–thinking about your past, but I want this experience to be ours, and ours alone–and I don’t know…special some how. It’s not just about me being with a man for the first time, it’s about being with you David.”

 

David took a deep breath, he was melting. Patrick is literally precious– _oh my gaaaaad, what is wrong with me. Precious???…when in my life have I ever characterized something as precious?!? I’m in BIG trouble._

 

Once they wrapped up at the store–they swung by the hotel so David could pickup his overnight bag. Patrick waited in the car in an attempt to avoid an awkward scene.

 

 _Well…so much for that._ Moira, Johnny and Alexis were all there when he arrived. _Good lord_ thought David, _this is going to be painful._  
  
“Hello, I’m just here to pack a bag. I’m staying with a friend tonight” said David nonchalantly.

 

“And what friend might that be” asked Moira–knowing full well based on today’s earlier encounter that it was likely “the button”.

 

“Well, if you must know, it’s Patrick”. said David pretending to reluctantly divulge the information, but actually secretly pleased to do so.

 

“Daaaavid–don’t do anything I wouldn’t do” Alexis said while winking profusely.

 

“Thankfully, that leaves me a laaaaat of leeway” said David gesticulating sarcastically.

 

“Wait” said Johnny “did I miss something?”

 

“Yes, dear” said Moira. “It appears that David and Patrick are engaged in some sort of _dalliance_.”

 

“Dalliance” said Johnny “what kind of dalliance?”

 

“OK, I think we’re done here” said David walking to the door. As he left, his whole family poked their heads out of the door to wave to Patrick–with Alexis making kissy faces and noises the whole time. _Mortifying_.

 

David returned to the car clearly flustered.

 

“You’re absolutely adorable when you’re traumatized” said Patrick with delight.

 

“Well I’m glad my distress is so entertaining for you”.

 

“Me too, you’re distressed so frequently, one of us might as well enjoy it” Patrick winked at him as he said this and leaned in for a kiss that stopped David in his tracks–and suddenly, all his angst and irritation disappeared, just like that.

 

And then they were on their way.

 

En route, Patrick casually mentioned that Ray likes to play Scrabble on Saturday nights, so they might get roped into a game or two.

 

“Scrabble.” David said with a slight cough “A game or two??? Dear God!”

 

“You’ll be fine. I grabbed a bottle of wine from the store to ease the pain, it’ll be fun.”

 

“Well, fun sounds like a bit of a stretch, but you’ll be there so it won’t be all bad” said David flirtatiously while squeezing Patrick’s knee.

 

And sure enough, Ray was right there to greet them as soon as they arrived.

 

“Good evening Patrick–I was hoping you would be arriving soon. I’ve prepared some snacks and the Scrabble board is ready to go. And David, I’m so pleased that you will be joining us this evening. The more the merrier!”

 

Never in his wildest nightmares did David ever think he would be playing Scrabble on a Saturday night–never. But for Patrick, he was willing to do almost anything. _Ok…anything_.

 

David had to admit, it actually turned out to be quite fun. For one, he won the first game–and Patrick seemed _very_ impressed, but besides that, Patrick was holding his hand under the table, running his fingers down David’s thigh and knee–leaning over for kisses every time Ray would leave the table to replenish the snacks. David _might_ have even played a few suggestive words for Patrick’s benefit–which resulted in some very hot, lingering looks. _Who knew Scrabble could be so sexy?_

 

As fun as it was, David was getting anxious to be alone with Patrick. When the second game was finally winding down, David exclaimed “Phew, I’m exhausted–and Patrick, I know you were up early for inventory today, so I’m sure you are too.”

 

“Oh, I forgot to mention” said Patrick casually “David is crashing here tonight, there are some repairs happening at the motel”.

 

“Wonderful” said Ray. “I’ll prepare the couch for David.”

 

“No Ray, David will be sleeping with me–in my room.” Patrick said very a-matter-of-factly.

 

David was as stunned as Ray by how direct Patrick was and also wildly turned on, _I mean like a rabid animal…in heat_. After an INCREDIBLY awkward pause Ray said “very well” and David and Patrick headed up to Patrick’s room.

 

As soon as David closed the door behind them, Patrick grabbed him by the waist and pulled him in for a kiss that could only be described as dizzying. It was a potent combination of sweet, sensual and aggressive. David responded by cradling Patrick’s face to kiss him even deeper–their tongues were now circling each other and the intensity was building. Patrick ran his hands through David’s hair, down his shoulders, landing on his ass. He pulled David even closer. Patrick began to slowly move his hips so their bodies rubbed against each other and David followed suit–they were both hard–it felt sooo good. David opened his eyes because he wanted to see Patrick experiencing all this for the first time–and it was indescribable, sooo hot. He ran his hands down Patrick’s chest and he felt him inhale deeply. He was about to move his hands even further down Patrick’s body, but he stopped himself.

 

David never wanted anyone more– _I mean EVER_ , that’s why he knew he should put the breaks on–a few minutes longer and it would be next to impossible to think clearly. He slowly pulled back and whispered in Patrick’s ear “this is incredible and I mean INCREDIBLE, but should we take a break?” This seemed to knock Patrick back into reality. “Thank you, David, you’re right, we should slow down.” Patrick wrapped his arms around David and held him, just held him for a good 5 minutes, maybe even longer. They stood there in each other’s arms breathing deeply and taking each other in until their heart beats slowed down and things felt less charged. David had never experienced anything like it­–it was truly disarming.

 

Patrick finally broke the silence “hey, I think I’m going to change into my pajamas­–make yourself at home, I’ll be back in a few minutes”. He gave David a quick kiss and headed into the bathroom.

 

This gave David a chance to survey the room. Patrick’s bedroom was perfectly him, the right balance of crisp and lived-in. Everything had a purpose and seemed well curated–which delighted David. Overall, it was sparse with the exception of a fairly large bookcase overflowing with books and a console in the corner that hosted a collection of vinyl records and a turntable. A few carefully chosen black and white photos hung on the wall above a queen-sized bed.

 

Patrick emerged from the bathroom in pajama pants and a Beatles t-shirt slightly embarrassed, “I’m sorry, I’m such a bad host, I should have let you have the bathroom first.”

 

“Don’t be silly” David moved toward him and gave him a peck on the lips, “and besides, this gave me a chance to check out your room” said David with a wink.

 

“And????” Patrick asked.

 

“And…I’m pleasantly surprised, it’s really lovely.”

 

Patrick seemed very pleased to hear this and blushed a bit, which made David smile.

 

“Ok, now I’m gonna change-be right back”. David closed the bathroom door and took a deep breath. He was completely smitten and he knew it. He didn’t understand why Patrick chose him. It was equal parts terrifying and exhilarating. All he could do was try not to fuck things up and hope that it would be different this time. _Please let it be different this time…please._

 

David quickly changed and returned to Patrick’s room to find him already in bed.

 

“May I join you?” asked David, not really sure how to proceed.

 

“Of course” answered Patrick softly. David pulled back the covers to find Patrick shirtless and in boxer briefs. “Sorry” said Patrick sheepishly “I’m a hot sleeper–I can’t sleep in pajamas”. _You certainly are a hot sleeper_ thought David… _you certainly are._

 

David slipped into bed and wrapped his arms around Patrick from behind.  

Patrick kissed him softly on the cheek and asked “would you mind taking your shirt off too?” “I really want to feel your skin against mine.” Without a word, David removed his shirt. Patrick turned to face him and longingly stared at David’s body. He grabbed him by the shoulders–his hands shaking, he leaned in and buried his face in David’s chest and took a deep breath–he then pressed himself against David and let out a quiet moan. “David, you smell so good and FEEL so good”– “I love the feeling of your arms around me and your body hair against my chest...and to be honest–I didn’t realize you were so, well, buff–I mean you always look great in your sweaters, but I’ve never actually seen your arms” he said teasingly, running his hands down David’s arms.

 

David shut his eyes tightly and inhaled sharply. He was so happy it actually hurt–which made him feel completely of control. He was reeling and he just couldn’t hide it.

 

“I’m sorry, is this weird for you?” asked Patrick searching David’s face with concern.

 

“No, it’s amazing Patrick, you’re amazing” giving him a light kiss on the forehead.

 

Patrick leaned in and kissed David very softly and whispered against his lips “ _you’re_ amazing”. They laid there, silently looking into each other’s eyes until Patrick started to dose off and finally said, “Ok I think I need to try to get some sleep, I was up all last night and now I’m starting to fade”.  Patrick turned over and positioned himself so David was spooning him from behind and asked sweetly “do you mind holding me as I fall asleep?”

 

“I would like that very much” said David softly.

 

With Patrick peacefully sleeping in his arms, David replayed everything that happened–his mind was racing. For most of the night it was hard to believe that Patrick had never been with a man before–he was so confident and such a natural–so sensual and intuitive–which actually, if he was being honest–was a bit surprising. But there was a definite shift when they got in bed together. It was so thrilling to watch him discover his body and be sooo turned-on by it, it drove him wild, but Patrick’s nervousness did show and served as a good reminder for David to take things slow. He knew in that moment he had to put Patrick first–which was a real shift for him. Normally that wouldn’t even be part of the equation–it would just be about getting off and getting out, but tonight was different and Patrick was different. It was Patrick’s first experience with a man and that man was David. It made David feel special, and he had never felt special before.

 

David awoke to the sound of an alarm. It was only when Patrick shifted to reach for his phone that David became fully awake and aware of his surroundings. A feeling of complete horror overtook him as he realized that he had a raging hard-on that was pressed against Patrick’s back, and for god knows how long. Maybe he was mistaken, but it seemed like there was a very deliberate and slow slide as Patrick repositioned himself in David’s arms after turning off the alarm.

 

“Ummm, sorry about that” David said sheepishly.

 

“What???” said Patrick playing dumb. “oh, you mean the morning wood?”  Patrick was truly amused with himself.

 

“Well, yes” said David “I’m sorry there is an unwelcome, surprise guest attending brunch this morning”.

 

“Who said the surprise guest was unwelcome? I’ve been enjoying his company for at least a good half hour, maybe longer.”

 

“Oh have you? I guess that makes things _slightly_ less mortifying” said David blushing.

 

“David, it’s cute–and hey, I can’t help it if I’m irresistible.”

 

Patrick turned over and pulled his body close to David’s. David could feel that he was sooo hard too. They exchanged a slow, deep kiss and slowly moved their bodies against each other, David was completely drunk with lust…

 

And just like that the alarm went off again, shocking them both back into reality.

 

“Fuuuuuuuuuck!!!!!!” David exclaimed.

 

 Normally David was a big fan of the snooze feature on any alarm, but not when it functioned as the electronic equivalent of a cock block. 

 

“Well, ok” said Patrick clearing his throat as he untangled himself from David, obviously flustered. “I guess that’s my cue to hop in the shower–I’m assuming you want to sleep in a bit more since you’re ‘not really a morning person’…on the upside, my shower is going to be a lot more fun than usual, I’ve got a lot to think about…” Patrick flashed David a devilish grin and headed into the bathroom.

 

David couldn’t help but notice how spectacular Patrick’s hard dick looked in his boxer briefs–AND was he crazy, or did Patrick basically just imply that he was going to jerk off in the shower while thinking about David?!?! David’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of an incoming text.

 

He glanced over and saw the text was from Patrick:

 

P–“Are you thinking about me?”

 

D–“Ummm, yes.” “Are you thinking about me?”

 

P–“Oh, yes.” “What else are you doing?’

 

David reached down and almost involuntarily and began to stroke himself.

 

D–“What are YOU doing?”

 

P– “Wouldn’t you like to know…See you in ten minutes or less J xoxo.”

 

Knowing Patrick was just on the other side of the door doing the exact same thing he was doing, sent him over the edge. It was possibly the most excited he’s ever been–the thought of Patrick cuming and what that would look like was too much for David. He came quickly and hard–it was intense. _Holy shit! What’s it going to be like when we’re actually together,_ David wondered wistfully…

 

A few minutes later Patrick emerged from the bathroom in a white robe with a big smile on his face. He leaned in, gave David a kiss and said “the bathroom is all yours”.

 

“Is that all you’ve got to say for yourself?”

 

“What?” said Patrick batting his eye lashes with pretend innocence.

 

“I guess when you said you wanted to take it slow, I was picturing things going a little differently. To be clear, I’m not complaining, believe me. You just continue to surprise me Patrick” Now standing, David took Patrick into his arms for a slow hug.

 

“David, being with you feels so natural and so right–I feel like I can finally be myself. I really appreciate that you took what I said about wanting to go slow seriously, and I do need to pace myself, but the last thing I want is for you to feel like you’re walking on egg shells. I’m not a virgin, I mean I guess I sort of am in some ways, but I don’t feel the need to pretend like I’ve never had ANY kind of sex before. When I felt you hard against my back this morning I’ve never been more turned on. I know I’m still not ready to take things to the next level just yet, but I don’t see any reason why we can’t find other ways to have fun in the meantime. I don’t want you to be sexually frustrated and I know I don’t want to be either.”

 

“Understood and appreciated, I just want you to feel comfortable.” Patrick’s openness was stunning and totally foreign to David. He couldn’t imagine feeling secure enough to be that open. He leaned in and gave Patrick one more slow kiss and then headed into the bathroom.

 

As he was stepping into the shower, David noticed something out of the corner of his eye. On the still foggy glass door of the shower Patrick had drawn a heart and inside it was written “Patrick + David" …


End file.
